Did You Make This?

Number ten of the twelve things my mom says daily that drives me nuts is “did you make this?” It could be a meal, or a snack, day or night; if I hand it to her she will always ask if I made it. 

Yes, sometimes I get to the point where I have stretched the truth. 

“Mom, here’s your Cheerios.” (Her favorite cereal).
“Did you make this?”
“Yes, I did, just this morning. (I opened the box and poured the milk).
“It doesn’t taste right.”  

Last week my husband went to the hundred dollar club (Costco) and on an impulse he bought a tray of lasagna. Well, the other day I was super busy and forgot about dinner so into the microwave it went. While it was being nuked I made green beans and a salad, it actually turned out to be good. So I made my mom a small plate. 

“What is this?”
“Lasagna.”
“It doesn’t look like lasagna?”
“I cut it into small pieces for you.”
“Did you make it?”

“Yes, I did.”
“I can’t eat it; it just doesn’t taste or smell right.” 

The next day for lunch, the same lasagna. 

“Mom, here’s some lasagna.”
“Did you make it?”
“No, it’s from Costco.”
“Oh, this is really good.” 

Okay, it didn’t take me long to figure this out. If I made it she won’t eat it, without a fuss, if its store bought its delicious. 

Even when I’ve offered her Oreo cookies, she’ll ask if I made them, only now my answer depends on how many cookies are left in the bag, get the picture? 

Oh yeah, I can play this game. 

Well, today she’s been on the war path, so just to get even I’m going to put some M&M’s in the candy dish, if she should ask, I made them.

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10 Responses to “Did You Make This?”


  1. 1 rogerdemented July 9, 2009 at 1:22 pm

    Thanks for making me smile.

    • 2 Nancy July 9, 2009 at 1:40 pm

      Every day I’m close to tears dealing with my mom, but at night when I tell my husband about my day, even I laugh. 🙂

  2. 3 Jennifer July 9, 2009 at 2:12 pm

    THANK YOU NANCY FOR A THE BIG SMILE ON MY FACE. I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND. MY DAD ASKS ME IF I MAKE DINNER FROM SCRATCH OR IF I BOUGHT IT. SO FUNNY. KEEP UP THE BLOG. HOPE TO MEET YOU AT GAILS SOON. JENNIFER

    • 4 Nancy July 9, 2009 at 6:09 pm

      Jennifer,

      I’m glad I was able to make you smile.
      I was talking to Gail the other day, and she was telling me how you take of your dad, we should hook them up and let them drive each other nuts 🙂

  3. 5 seniorsafari July 9, 2009 at 4:29 pm

    Too funny!!!!!!!

    Nancy, you have such great wit and a wonderful sense of humor in your writing. I envy that and find it very admirable!

    You know, when you’re feeling down about your Mom, you don’t have to write about her. Write about something else in your daily life or family life that’s enjoyable for you.

    Meantime, keep looking at the funny side of it all! Because there IS one.
    Luv ya,
    Barbara

    • 6 Nancy July 9, 2009 at 6:22 pm

      I should start writing more about my family, because they are as humorous as my mom is stressful. Lately Paul and Muriel have been so busy with work; I’ve hardly seen them, and Dana, Chris and Mac travel quite a bit and have been gone almost two weeks (Denmark, Russia and Germany). But I’m sure as soon as things get back to normal I’ll have quite a bit to say.

      Barbara, one thing I found is that when I’m stressed out with my mom, writing about it helps lower my stress level; I guess you could say it’s a form of cheap therapy.

      Hugs Nancy

  4. 7 Jennifer July 10, 2009 at 3:40 pm

    LOL
    WE SHOULD!! WE COULD GO TO CHEESECAKE FACTORY FOR LUNCH AND LET MEALS ON WHEELS TAKE CARE OF THEM. SEE I HAVE MEALS ON WHEELS FOR DAD SO HE CAN’T BITCH ABOUT FOOD. ARCADIA IS ONE CITY THAT OFFERS IT TO SENIORS. IT IS HOSPITAL FOOD BUT HE CAN’T COMPLAIN IT IS TO SPICY OR NOT WHAT HE LIKES. SIMPLE FOOD.

    • 8 Nancy July 10, 2009 at 5:05 pm

      Now, we deserve a little more time away, how about the Cheesecake Factory in Santa Barbara? Or better yet, let’s send them to the Cheesecake Factory on Dial a Ride and pay the driver to drive home the long way.

      🙂

  5. 9 Peggy July 12, 2009 at 7:09 am

    Nancy, thank you for writing your experiences w/ your Mom. My Mom is pretty independent at 83, but I have a different kind of problem.
    Here’s a little background first: Mom had 5 children, me being the oldest, for years she always told me I had a specialness because I was the ‘first’. I am the only child that lives near Mom, my sisters, brother live out of state. When my dad was alive he had medical issues for 28 yrs (died in ’94), Mom became his caregiver the last 8 yrs of his life. In 2000 Mom & Jim married. All was good until Jim had chronic arthritis, and other health issues and by 2005, he is in a wheelchair and Mom finds herself as caretaker. Jim has since been in an assistant living home for 2 yrs, he literally does nothing but sit, sleep, eat.
    My husband & I have been her support system for 30 yrs; we have moved her from house to house, to apt to apt to current residence. We have taken care of her car, taken her on trips w/ us over the yrs, call her most every day, visit every other wkend, take her shopping etc. In the past 6 yrs WHY can’t my mom ever agree with anything I talk about, suggest to her, or do for her? She never use to be so contrary, defensive and negative to me. When my sisters/brother visit, she can carry on a normal conversation; with me, she can’t agree on anything (just like she didn’t w/ Dad). We seem to do ok on the phone, but not as well in person. People tell me this is common to lash out at the child that does the most for them, but I’ve always been sensitive, and I can’t just turn my feelings off. My mom was great raising us 5, taking us to ballet, music lessons and she use to laugh all the time. Is she really lashing out at me b/c Jim has been disabled and not like a ‘husband’ the past 5 yrs? Meanwhile, all the things I/we have done the past 30 yrs is not recognized or thank you said to me by my sisters (my brother does) & I have feelings of resentment b/c they always hve every weekend to themselves. Today we are going to the assistant living hm to move Jim’s clothes to another floor b/c he now needs full-time care. I would love to be in the garden ….
    Thanks everyone for listening — I don’t mean to sound like a whiner.

    • 10 Nancy July 12, 2009 at 8:55 am

      Peggy, it sounds like were in the same boat, and sinking fast.
      Your mom like mine, have one thing in common, a daughter who will take on the responsibility of their daily physical and emotional needs. Our difference is that while I only have a brother, you have four siblings. My brother acknowledged from the beginning he would not be able to care for our mom, but he has always recognized that I have made sacrifices and always gives me my kudos. Your brother seems to be the same. Your sisters on the other hand, don’t acknowledge all you do because if they did they would have to admit they do not do their fair share. I guess it’s their way to avoid guilty feelings. Also it could be that if they appeared to sympatric to your plight, you might ask them for help.
      Your mom sounds like mine, always critical, negative and angry and it’s always directed to us, why because they know we’ll never leave.
      I try not to have resentment, because it was me that made the decision to care for my mother. Would I like to have a weekend alone with my husband yes, I do get away on occasion but not on a regular basis and its funny when I do get away I worry like when my kids were younger.
      One thing we should be grateful for is our husbands they not only put up with us but our mothers too.

      Hugs Nancy


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