Guest Entry #4

I remember the first time I met Nancy and The Saint. Paul and I had gone somewhere, probably Ikea, and he was bringing me back to his house. He spoke on the phone with his mom, letting him know we were coming by. I could tell there were questions, who’s Muriel? where did she come from? does she like steak?

At first, I didn’t bother to care or worry about meeting his parents, although it did occur to me that this is usually an important moment in the whole dating scene. Shouldn’t I be dressed nicely, shaking hands across a dinner table, with pep talks about Nancy’s taste in food and The Saint’s news topics? But, I have nerves of steel and it takes quite a bit to rattle them.

Everything was fine in the car and up the driveway and into the house, until I see them sitting on the couch. I panicked. I don’t know why. I didn’t flail or stutter or giggle incessantly, although that may have been better. I became entirely silent. I seem to remember Nancy even asked questions and I had one word replies.

Paul ended up speaking for me.
“Muriel’s in graphic arts.”
“Yeah, she knows Ker from high school.”
“She normally speaks, but she has an allergy to your face.”

The meeting didn’t last long, and afterwards, I felt like my insides were free to breathe. I don’t know why I froze or had nothing to say, but because of this first meeting, and the way I’m fairly outspoken now, Nancy always says that the family has corrupted me.

Maybe someday she’ll realize I was corrupted long before she and the family entered my life.


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